Looking for Evidence: The Case for Your Own Worthiness

The other morning, I was doing that dangerous thing - thinking. You know, “just for a minute.” I’d gone down the rabbit hole of comparing myself to everyone else’s success - houses, lifestyle, retirement legacy wealth.  There is always someone with a more successful business, someone else buying a vacation house, and another running marathons while smiling like it was a day off. Meanwhile, I was wondering why I can’t complete my top 2 projects, why I'm not achieving more, or just... being more. In about thirty seconds, I’d built an air-tight case that I was clearly behind in life.

Then I stopped and actually laughed. Because I realized - I was the one choosing what evidence to collect and believe. I could just as easily look for proof that I’m exactly where I should be: grateful for an abundant life, the times I’ve grown through hard sh@#$t, the people I’ve supported, the small wins I often overlook. We’re all master investigators, but too often we’re gathering data for the wrong team. It’s time to switch teams and start building a case for our own worth.

Mel Robbins talks about this in her TED Talk “How to Stop Screwing Yourself Over.” She says, “You’re never going to feel like it.” Meaning - confidence doesn’t come before action; it comes from action. The more we act like we’re enough, the more evidence we gather that we are. Every time we speak kindly to ourselves, follow through on a promise, or choose a nap without guilt, we add another piece of evidence that we’re worthy - not someday, not when we’re perfect, but right now.

So here’s your challenge this week: start collecting proof of your worth.
1️⃣ Catch the critic. When that inner voice pipes up with “you should’ve” or “you’re not,” pause and ask, “Is that fact or just fear?”
2️⃣ Flip the focus. Write down three pieces of evidence each day that show you’re growing, learning, or showing up. (They can be tiny: “I didn’t lose my cool in traffic” totally counts.)
3️⃣ Celebrate your humanity. Midlife isn’t about flawless - it’s about fearless. The scars, the lessons, the wisdom and even the chaos, are all proof that you’re still evolving.

So the next time your brain starts building a case against your worthiness - stop. You are the master of your thoughts, the curator of your evidence, and the witness to your own life!

- Kim