My New Holiday Rules: Protecting My Sobriety & Boosting the Joy

There’s something about December that makes even the calmest among us feel like we’re stuck inside one of those snow globes being aggressively shaken by a toddler. Note: I watched my granddaughter mesmerized by a snow globe last weekend and it brought tears – so simple yet so beautiful! The snow falls, the calendar fills, the grocery list multiplies, and suddenly we’re bracing ourselves like we’re about to enter a competitive sport called Holiday Survival. But this year, I’m taking a different approach—I’m matching the energy of the winter snowstorm and flipping it right into full-blown Christmas spirit. Not the “I must host the perfect dinner and find the perfect gift and avoid the family argument about politics” kind of spirit—but the real kind: connection, silliness, warmth, and remembering that joy doesn’t come from the plan; it comes from the people. Even the weird ones. Especially the weird ones.

I know I say this every year, but this year I MEAN it! 

This year, I decided I’m not bracing for the holidays—I’m embracing them. And because sobriety is one of the greatest gifts I’ve ever given myself, I’m going into December with a list of things I’m actually going to try. No pressure, no perfection, just fun, joy, and staying connected to myself instead of the wine table.

1. I’m making a family pact: no one is allowed to get offended until January 3rd.
   Truly, nothing protects sobriety like less drama. If someone gets sassy, the rule is they must immediately put on a Santa hat. Actually, I will just get one for myself to wear the whole time! You cannot take yourself seriously in a Santa hat, and it keeps the emotional temperature lower than a December morning in Calgary.
2. I’m choosing “presence over presents.”
   Instead of shopping stress, I’m giving connection. Experiences. Funny photos. Homemade cards – ok – nothing homemade, that’s waaaaayyyy too much of a stretch. Moments that matter and don’t require a credit limit increase.
3. I’m scheduling a daily “Silent Night Hour.”
   No talking. No planning. No performing. Just twinkle lights, and me remembering that I still have a pulse and a soul.
4. Say Sorry when playing Sorry! Sorry is my favourite board game – that makes sense as I am Canadian. So committing to play 10 games of Sorry over the holidays is a game changer – we can say sorry for things we have done, might or will do.  Magical.

At the end of the day, Christmas isn’t meant to be endured; it’s meant to be lived—messy, sparkly, loud, loving, and occasionally off-key. The winter blues can actually boost us if we let them—snow slows us down, cold brings us in close, and darkness means twinkle lights look brighter. This year, let’s embrace the chaos with open arms and open hearts. Let’s choose joy on purpose. And when the family arrives and things go sideways (because they always do), just smile and think: Ah yes, the magic is happening.

One of my favourite TED Talks this time of year is Shawn Achor’s “The Happy Secret to Better Work.” He talks about how happiness isn’t the reward at the end of success—it’s the foundation. And honestly? That is the entire secret to surviving (and loving) holiday season energy. Instead of waiting for everything to be “done” so you can finally sit down and enjoy yourself, you infuse joy first, and everything else follows.

- Kim