When You Feel Like the Leftover Guac Nobody Wanted

Ever walk into a room and instantly feel like an extra in a movie where no one gave you the script? Maybe you weren’t invited to a group dinner, not in the family photo, or worse—someone “accidentally” left you off the reply-all. Ouch. It stings. And if you're anything like most of us (with just the right sprinkle of people-pleasing and a PhD in Overthinking), you’ve probably asked: Did I do something wrong? Is everyone mad at me? Should I fake an injury to make them feel bad?

The truth is, not every exclusion is about you. But some might be—and that’s where things get interesting. The trick is figuring out what’s your ego and what’s an actual red flag. Your ego says, “How dare they? I’m amazing!” But a grounded self says, “Hmm… was this intentional or just a case of ‘life is messy’?” One is fuelled by the need to be validated. The other is checking the facts while sipping a green smoothie, unbothered.

Here’s a handy guide: If you’re writing an imaginary breakup text to your group chat at 3am, it’s probably ego. If you’ve communicated honestly, stayed authentic, and the behaviour still repeats—it might be time to set a boundary or rethink your circle. Ego loves drama. Soul loves peace. Pick your party.

The best move? Step back. Breathe. Ask yourself: Is this situation taking away from my peace or pointing me to my growth? Then, channel your inner Oprah and choose the high road. (Bonus: the view is better and there’s less traffic.) Use humour to defuse, not defend. Because let’s face it, nothing is more powerful than being so grounded you could moonwalk through rejection and still be kind.

- Kim